However unlikely it may seem
That one sound can bring comfort to some
And terror to others
Much like the flickering lights
And closed in spaces,
You appear indifferent
You are calm, able to smile
It must be nice,
In your world.
For it’s obvious to me
That, for now, you aren’t really there
As for you, you make me smile
A reminiscent smile
At an age I feel I may have passed
Or even never partaken in
A small chuckle behind your hands
And a gossip about a man
That you have never met
But despise all the same
“He said he’s going to propose in two years.”
Spontaneity and romanticism may be dead after all
“She can’t have said yes…”
I wonder if you realise how cliché you sound
Or that the woman next to you
Is shuffling closer to me
And rolling her eyes in my direction
Wondering if I will judge you too
You too, make me smile
Not for a time that has already been
But one that I may experience
In a foreseeable future.
I can see in her eyes
This was not the life she had planned
As daddy’s little ‘princess’
How long ago was it,
And how much does she miss it
Now that she must learn the rules
Of something that doesn’t come with a manual.
I ask myself if you appreciate her
As much as she does you
It wasn’t like she expected
It’s hard
And she feels alone
The train rocks you
As she does
Until your eyes droop
And you sleep soundly in her arms
She smiles, finding happiness
In being here
With you
She will try her best
For you
To be a good person
To say yes more than no
To tell you the truth
And stand by you
My stop approaches faster than I expected
And I shift in my seat
Feeling an uncomfortable heat
Trapped in my coat
The coldest winter in over thirty years
Apparently
She’s trying to make eye contact
With you
Across the aisle
And across me
I almost feel violated too
As her stare bores into your closed lids
Your eyes dart underneath
Trying not to open
As a giggle breaks out across the way
Breaking the quiet
And one eye cracks open
To glare in that direction
She looks again
Seeing that flash of panic
Cross your face
As you realise she’s back
I chuckle to myself
As your eyes crinkle shut
And you pretend to doze once more
We reach the escalators
And bottleneck together
To allow two lanes of traffic
A slow lane
And a fast line
As they rush up to the office
With coffee in hand
Sloshing back and forth in the cup
And splashing their Armani suit
I can relax
And run my foot against the bristles
On the side of the escalator
Like the children behind me
Finding the simpler things in life the best.
Dinner is on the kitchen side
Waiting for me
Although you’ve already eaten
You decide to sit with me
Asking me about my day
With the genuine interest
That you always seem to have
That I love about you
That makes me smile
When I see your disappointed expression
As I say
“Same old, same old.”
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